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Sobriety Rant Journal: March 1, 2025

As I wake up clear headed, fresh, and sober, I’d like to reflect.

Two years, 5 months, and 11 days sober.

Is living a sober life good or bad for me? Well I can tell you one thing, I ain’t dead yet! The alcohol may have killed me by now if it weren’t for sobriety. Whether I died from disease, got hit by a train, or stabbed in a fist fight while blacked out. Mixing various drugs and street drugs with the alcohol… What about the other positives?

Being sober (for me) comes with many advantages as well as disadvantages. But I’m sticking with the advantages this morning… My life is stable, no more drunk tanks, arguments and losing friends over bullshit. That’s done… I also don’t have to hustle no more, no need to! And thank god for that. What else… well I don’t sell nothing I own for booz. I also have started collecting various things; I call it feeding my inner child, although I’m a Buddhist I feel my inner child is important. Always be kind to yourself.

Being sober has helped my relationships. With parents, girlfriend, friends, other family members. And I sure as hell ain’t getting into fights with strangers! My parents know I’m trying my best to keep my head up and stay out of trouble despite my mental health problems, they know… So they wouldn’t hesitate to help me in any current situation. And when I was drinking I would often pick fights with everyone, even my girlfriend; who lives far as I’m in a long distance relationship. Life just seems much easier.

Thank you universe for guiding me here and anyone who helped me along the way.

A little rant complete.

If anyone is reading this whom Ive hurt with my drinking, I am truly sorry.

-Nina

Ride a breeze

Chilled da fuks out; Let the breeze in

I need moe’ chemical incentives sedative let em’ in too

Cause I been through too much to touch on

Now I’m enhancing my lush lawn, cause the grass is greener

On my side, on the sideline of the van city to infinity

Faded amaze jaded nuff’ to fall asleep on the bus

Headed nowhere fast so the enjoyment lasts

Crushed velvet cushions of clouds I sleep on

Awakened awaiting my fate but I can see dawn