Tag Archives: Alcoholism

Sobriety Rant Journal: March 1, 2025

As I wake up clear headed, fresh, and sober, I’d like to reflect.

Two years, 5 months, and 11 days sober.

Is living a sober life good or bad for me? Well I can tell you one thing, I ain’t dead yet! The alcohol may have killed me by now if it weren’t for sobriety. Whether I died from disease, got hit by a train, or stabbed in a fist fight while blacked out. Mixing various drugs and street drugs with the alcohol… What about the other positives?

Being sober (for me) comes with many advantages as well as disadvantages. But I’m sticking with the advantages this morning… My life is stable, no more drunk tanks, arguments and losing friends over bullshit. That’s done… I also don’t have to hustle no more, no need to! And thank god for that. What else… well I don’t sell nothing I own for booz. I also have started collecting various things; I call it feeding my inner child, although I’m a Buddhist I feel my inner child is important. Always be kind to yourself.

Being sober has helped my relationships. With parents, girlfriend, friends, other family members. And I sure as hell ain’t getting into fights with strangers! My parents know I’m trying my best to keep my head up and stay out of trouble despite my mental health problems, they know… So they wouldn’t hesitate to help me in any current situation. And when I was drinking I would often pick fights with everyone, even my girlfriend; who lives far as I’m in a long distance relationship. Life just seems much easier.

Thank you universe for guiding me here and anyone who helped me along the way.

A little rant complete.

If anyone is reading this whom Ive hurt with my drinking, I am truly sorry.

-Nina

Drowned sorrows

I am an addict; since twelve

Ive delved.

Weed, crack, heroin, crystal, mushrooms, lsd

More than all of these

Alcohol consumes me

I consume it; fluent in being a nuisance

Constantly picking up shattered pieces

My hands and heart are bleeding

The world seems iced and freezing

Do I still have meaning

Purpose

Am II worthless

These are the questions I ask Looking back at my past

Im trying so hard to keep compusure

Trauma upon trauma with no closure

My central nervous system is shot

So im constantly nervous

Everybody thinks Im happy but that’s just a surface

Im not trying to complain we all have pain

I wanna remain on this plain of love and gains

Music and poetry; the essence of me knowing me

That Im not such a terrible girl

That’s I have so much to offer the world

But Im crying out for help to all my friends and love

I cant do this alone sometimes Im looking above

Can god help me out a bit

Ive fallen and I can never seem to get out of it

A rhyming rant chant of the addict

Sobriety day one; let me have a crack at it.