Tag Archives: Dreams

The toy box in my bedroom. A short story. – Nina

Once upon a time, perhaps in another dimension of sorts. Or perhaps an altered reality ( a parallel to the norm which had been departed ). There was a world… it was a dark world like our own although the visions and communications to the mind lay shrouded in an unknown; as to wake up drunk in an amusement park in an abandoned ghost town. All those who enter this realm are intoxicated… euphoric… Or confused.

In this place the laws of physics are often bent, finding oneself transporting from one place to the next. Perhaps flying over the maps of which the reality created unto itself. It is itself; a living and growing place. It’s a place you’ve never been, but you have, faces you’ve never seen but it’s as though a permanent dejavu. Traveling along to its ominous melody.

I find myself in this place often. I climb under the barbed wire and war torn trenches just to see how deep this rabbit hole goes, the blood and destroyed homes visions of viciously broken families. Different tribes that dwell in this place and different spirits.

I’ve seen myself touched by the souls of the dead, although strangling me and taking my breath… killing me, I and only I entrusted with Devine powers to to speak amongst the spiritual realm…and flying across an infinite ocean. I wish I could go back to those times in this place.

This is a violent place, mostly deserted  I have been killed, I’ve killed, had sex many times. I’ve been killed many times in this place and seen life simply placed back into my chest. Leaving me unsure if death is real. There is no contemplation here, too much fog for one to adress mathematics once arrived.

I found myself in horrific post war slums, a child with no parents… There was a mattress and toy box. I’m around 5 years old. As the box opens…I’m not sure exactly what these toys, these memories, they see me, they all see me. You see it was me in the the box. Everything I’ve ever known. In this box. In this place.

When one finds themselves in this place… it can be dangerous. To see light amidst the fog, is… blinding enlightenment, a simple light; it’s as though the heart you use in this place stops beating but… There is no heart. You are always …Gone or missing… One thing is for sure, you are very much: alone.

Of course there is a way out, isn’t there? I think as you are reading this you might be beginning to understand. The subconscious; the infinite abstract of emptiness in form. Not simply the universe seeing itself. Not simply an imaginary delusion of grandiose proportion. That little voice sketched in your head… that lingering feeling in the back of your mind….

Nina… it’s time to wake up…

 

 

Dreams.

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I dream every night. It’s like I don’t sleep; I’m far to busy venturing rivers and streams, painting graffiti on infinite trains.

My dreams are what dreams are made of. My mind is the money so my vacation is paid up.

Tropical paradises on every turn. I’ve never seen so many gorgeous baby blue pools with pearls twirling my world.

I can fly if I want to and explore. I’m getting good, in fact I’m better than Peter pan. Taking off is tricky but I always land.

My dreams have music so I wake up singing with love. Lyrics that no conscious mind could think of.

My dreams have more amusing amusement parks than Californi and Dubai put together. My subconscious really got her shit together.

I have nightmares worst than Steven kings, but I’ve been into horror flicks since I was a kid.

But this is real time 3d and if it’s too deep I wake up n have some tea.

I dream.

Every.

Single.

Night.

I get lost in pitch black in my bed on a trip LSD couldn’t bring to light.

I get to live past futures; in surreal movements, clearer than glass to my mind when it computes it.

But my minds far more complex. More convex it sees more than I can comprehend.

How many times I saw the end or woke up to a new beginning, open my eyes and the rooms spinning,

Damn I’m dizzy that was trippy.

What were those lyrics I heard angels signings?

I turn the light on.

I got the light, write before it’s gone.

Pick up a pen and write down this midnight song.

 

-Nina

 

Journaling.

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It’s 5 am in the city I call home. The usual wake up time and I’m remembering my dreams as I do every night; a more fluid world….slightly terrified simply because my vivid dream world is so different to the real world I wake up to. It takes me 45 minutes to aclimatise to the new energies coming into my psyche and today it was overwhelming.

Writing is something I do as soon as I get up, they say the subconscious mind is still active. Perfect for the creative type. I have my coffee and peace of mind as the words I create slowly fill the screen. Writing gives me peace of mind. It also gives me peace of mind to be in love and fully transitioned into the woman I am today. I feel lucky.

I have an extroverted mind yet there’s a side of me attached to my lonesome creative or playful alone time; the introverted side important for my growth as a person. I hate writing about myself in a sense because usually when I come back to it I’m either disappointed in myself or something doesn’t quite feel right. On the other hand if I write in completely positive pretext about my life and situations it seems to make me happy to look back to myself standing strong in the face of danger.

Today is amazing.

Nina

The interconnected manifest – Nina

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The abstract thoughts relevant to concrete form;

everything is connected making the magic very real

Submerged in self awareness yet profoundly connected

in imaginative design and inclinations creating and manifesting its form

Dreams and reality are not so far apart; both created by the mind and collected in the mind

to be analyzed and articulated

What today may bring is up to me as well as the destiny

We’ll have to work together or bound in self destruction

I can make today whatever I want it to be

Setting Destiny Stones for me to walk upon with grace

Or they could tower over me; an abrupt fate

Creating overwhelming fear in my heart

But if I choose to take destiny

Fate and future into my hands

I know I can surely manifest

Stepping stones upward on this journey into tomorrow

Into the sky with my dreams once again.

 

Nina Yin

The Blueprint

IMG_20160112_065813_hdr_kindlephoto-61181560The pen slowly glides along the paper, it completes the secular void of lines. It creates the books inner dreams and inhibitions. It defines the purpose and life of the creator.

My journal: my harness of inner energy and means of self justification. I use it to control my past, present and future; it acts as a portal to my hopes dreams and fantasies.

Even to me I am unclear of whom I am and what I will become, so it’s important to create:

The Blueprint***

Nina Yin Vestergaard