Category Archives: My Poetry

She’s my light; I won’t be lonely… I sleep.

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You know I’m in another place, It isn’t there, but its the only…

Thing I know… Its my dreams;

and I follow them till dawn when I hear your voice

I’m going to be dancing in waterfalls until the sunrise; I can’t help it!

There we are… Together… And neither of us had to move as I dream of your beautiful face!

I must be smiling in my dreams; Im sure of it when its you and me…

So when we say goodnight and I drift away

I came SO MUCH closer to you; your beautiful grace…

You’re my light; so I’ll never be lonely

And It Goes Without

Sayin’….

I love you.

-Nina

She carries a mask.

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My nickname is Shade

And I carry with me; many sides.

Growing up they diagnosed me as many things.

They said I was attention deficit. They said I was oppositional defiant They said I was bipolarThey said I was scitzophrenic

And now I am being treated for borderline personality disorder

Its true that I carry these faces and sides like masks hidden beneath the surface. How fitting.

My nickname is shade.

My scitzo effective side terrifies me. My bipolar side is attracted to danger and substance. I am naturally defiant. I am often hyper-active… And they say I am one with borderline personality disorder.

They say that someone with borderline personality disorder can be dangerous. Because we tend to snap in an instant. For me in some cases this is true…

In one instance; stopped by police I pulled my weapon on them! I snapped. Luckily I was not shot…

Where am I going with this….

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I carry these faces and sides.

They hide beneath and hide below.

Where did they come from? I do not know…

They hide until the perfect moment.

Things I cannot control.

 

-Nina

 

 

 

Laid in an ocean and exhaled the sky.

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Laid in an ocean and exhaled the sky…

Sweet meditation; Like Lucid Dreams

Thank you for these.

Drops of rain.

Fall upon me

As I inhale the ocean and exhale the breeze

Such ease…

How the water caresses my body and light tantalize my eyes

Laid in an ocean…and exhaled the sky.

….

After my mediation

I make a humbling plea

I am now

Placed on my knees

And bowing in threes

Taken away

And I return to the ground

I seeked absolute nothing

*Absolute was found.*

 

-Nina

She can’t give up…

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She won’t …

Beaten as the path we all walk till our deaths

Beaten bruised tattered and torn

Yet…

She is the fiery storm;

The fiery storm she fears the more than anything

Yet she won’t give up

She walks… and walks…

Alone in solitude

She veils herself like an ancient goddess

Hidden amongst shadows

Why wouldn’t she be?

On planet corrupted with dark clouds?

One must be protected but

The rain pours and drips down…

Alone, cold, damp and dark

Reflections of it all beaming upward

At her face looking sadly down

Dreary gloom…

Her feet place upon them;

Cascading the lights and reflective glow

Lights of dreams always forever flicker and move amongst the rain

She keeps walking

She has to go…

The wake of her forgotten smile is somewhere

So she searches for it

Until time ceases to exist

She can’t give up.

She won’t…

Walking on the beaten path we all walk

Till death.

-Nina

GoodnightNina  – Who knew? Transitioning ; Slam Poetry

I was always picked last in sports, I laugh at being picked last

because they saw past what I could; not even…

Recognise in the first place, never did I see first place in sports

But I took up a new gender like sports, wait…

Lets reverse pace; I was picked last because perhaps

They knew before I knew I knew I was a girl, I knew I was a girl?

Did I twirl? Was that the give-away?

I remember once I was told I look like one. Twelve; Dumbfounded

Delve into childhood, Perhaps That was the time I began to find myself…

I’m not sure… What I am sure of,

Is I can never be sure of damn near anything

Other than my decision to transition, that meant everything.

It wasn’t hard to transition at all.

It was hard to pretend to be a man like fraud (((guilty as charged))) 🙂 !!

-Pause-

Serious shit…

I feel complete sorrow, for all those that can’t transition tomorrow

This god damn world, I’m lucky as fuck.

Its called hormone replacement therapy;

And it worked wonders for my clarity

Anyone against transgender rights can spare me

“Beware the”

Powers of hatred in the world

Us girls got it hard sometimes; That scares me

Ive survived a lot

Extremely thankful, to be doing different things for a bankroll

Write a little rhyme thats tasteful.

Thank God….

-Nina

They knew before I Knew I was a girl. (Did I twirl?)

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I was always picked last-in sports. I laugh at being picked-last because they saw past what I could not. Even recognize in the first place. Never did I see first place in sports but I took up a new gender like sports… wait… lets reverse pace. I was picked last because perhaps they knew before I knew I was a girl before I… Knew I was a girl. (Did I twirl?) Was that the give away? I remember once being told I looked like one. I was absolutely dumbfounded ; at the age of 12. Delve into childhood.  Perhaps that was around the time I began to find my self. Im not sure… What I’m sure of is that I can never be sure of… damn near anything. OTHER THAN MY DECISION TO TRANSITION. That meant everything.

It wasn’t hard to transition at all, it was hard to pretend to be a man like FRAUD. (Guilty as charged)!. I feel complete sorrow for my sisters across the globe who would die to transition but can’t because of this GOD DAMN world. “I’m waiting on tomorrow”

Im lucky as FUCK… and Its called hormone replacement “therapy” and it worked miracles for my clarity. Anyone against transgender rights can spare me. Beware the… power of hatred in the world; us girls got it hard sometimes and that scares me. I survived a lot and Im extremely thankful. I could do a lot of different things for a bankroll but I’d rather write a little rhyme thats… tasteful.

*Thanks god*

Love you Larissa.

XO

-Nina

Awakened.

 

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I came from another place; A place where I was placed in a war: in the spiritual world. The truth bared all.  From the sadistic to the beautiful in awe.  Where the true inner child is free and wild. With all of the world on my fingertips… I carefully spinned it… A fragile God.  With an intent to prevent harm. Closed eyes revealed all. This was simply the norm as the signs were devised in many forms; all was materalized before my eyes. No; I was not surprised;

To be awakened at all…